Unmasking Fake Friends

“Losing fake friends is a part of growing up, it’s just something that happens. Just like snakes shed their skin, replaceable people are…well. Replaced.”

Fake friends. We have all had at least one in our lives. They wear a mask and pretend to be a true friend and act like they care about you, but deep down, they could care less.
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When you get older and start to grow up, sometimes you tend to think that you are losing friends in your life. But in reality, you are just losing the people who were not there with the right intentions. You aren’t losing real friends, you are losing the people who pretended to be your friend.

Real situations, expose the fake friends. When you start to grow up, when you move away, or when you aren’t there for their beck and call anymore, they disappear. These people at one point may have seemed loyal, but they were only loyal to you for what you offer them. Once things change that aren’t in their favor, their loyalty seems to suddenly change along with it. This is when you notice that you were only a convenience to them and they didn’t actually care about you.

You come across the fake friends that consider you as a “convenient friend.”
Maybe they have better plans so they cancel yours. Maybe their other friends are busy so they call you. They think of you last and you’re not the priority, so they don’t make time for you, unless it is convenient for them. You deserve better than to be the convenient friend. These people might say they like you and that they consider you to be one of their best friends, but do they really act like it? When you’re in need of someone, are they there for you? When you’re in town for a weekend when you moved away, do they make time to see you? Why should you prioritize someone who does not prioritize you?

You come across the fake friends that want you to do good, but not better than them.
People will tell you to your face that they want you to be happy, to succeed and do good. They can say all the right things, but do they REALLY mean it? Sure, they want you to be happy and do good. I don’t think someone really wants you to be sad and suffer (unless they are just a hateful person). But they don’t want you to be happier than them, better off, or to even look better than them. I have had friends who try to sabotage my happiness because they wanted what I had; others have stopped being my friend because I have moved on to bigger & better things. I have also seen SO many girls who try their hardest to get their “friend” to not look better than them when they are going out because they want all eyes on them.

Ever since I was a kid, I could never recognize the fake friends. My parents ALWAYS could and so could other important people in my life. But I always gave people the benefit of the doubt and defended them, and then they would let me down. It would take me getting hurt and stabbed in the back to realize that they weren’t a true friend. Thats who I am, I see the good in people and I give people more times than not the benefit of the doubt. Its a blessing and a curse. Even though I will probably come across more people in my life who seem great but end up being another “fake friend,” I have come to the point in my life where I can see who truly cares for me and who doesn’t.

As we grow up we realize that it is better to be alone than to be surrounded by fake friends and that it is okay to lose some people. Not all of the people you lose have to be considered a loss. Replace those people in your life, move on, find your true friends, do better and be happy. Recognize when someone is genuine and appreciate those people.

The quote at the beginning of this post was written by, believe it or not, my best friend, Shelby. Her and I were talking about friendship when she had said it. We found each other at a time when both of us were experiencing the worst of fake friends. We were both stabbed in the back by someone who we considered to be a very close friend, and then we found each other. When you find a true friend, it makes you very aware to all of the crappy “friends” out there. Appreciate all of your true friends and never take them for granted!! Treat people how you want someone to treat you.

Some of my true friends: Shelby, Ashley & KK!

Make sure you check out my other post about friends, in “I’m the Girl Without the “Friend Group”


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11 thoughts on “Unmasking Fake Friends

  1. Sierra, this really hit a home for me. After my first year of college, I made some amazing friends. However, in high school, I was unfortunate to have some friends that were toxic. The first summer home from college is weird because I know they are around, but I also want to protect my heart and stick to knowing my worth! Fake friends really aren’t worth it. Thanks for the amazing advice!

    Much love,
    Ashley | dearash.com

    1. I’m going through that now! I just finished my freshman year so I’m surrounded by the memories of old friends but I have to remind myself that if they were true friends they would call or make an effort to me! I just remember that I am better for it because I have realized what makes a true friend vs a fake one!

  2. It is so hard to find truly good friends. Most of my close friends are about 5-10 years older than me and I’m perfectly okay with that. This last year I’ve been divesting myself of people who aren’t helping me grow and it’s very freeing. I look at friendship like dating. You have to experience what you don’t like to discover what you do.

    1. A lot of my friends are older too! Within only a couple years tough, but I like it! And I agree very much to you!! Thanks for your comment

  3. I can so relate with this topic. We all have some or the other friend who is such a fake. It is necessary to unearth their reality and not get fooled by them.

  4. Friendships can be so great, especially when growing up! I still have some of my childhood friends. I wish people would just be real though! And I hope we can all consider ourselves to be true friends

  5. Real friends are very difficult to find. I find it better to have one true friend than 5 fake friends and I’ve definitely learned this as I’ve gotten older. I loved this post!

  6. This is so relatable since I had been through this! True friends are very difficult to find, and I feel like just having one or two close friends means more than having 10 fake friends who doesn’t care about you after all. Good post!

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